Are you listening?

The day after the Parkland, Florida school shooting the actions of my students showed they wanted everything to normal, wanted to get work, wanted to be ok and just wanted to go on.  My 7th hour (7th grade) started out the same as all others classes, normal. Then my computer started to ping with messages from my students. “Mrs. Skiles can you shut your door more often?  We are the first classroom to the outside door, that is a little scary.” “Can you put the magnetic in your door and keep it locked, it will give us more time to get to our safe space?” “A doorstop in the closet door might be better than leaving closed, we can kick the doorstop for the door to shut.”   I watched a student get up and check the back door to see if it was locked, noticed another’s eye kept looking down the foyer to the classroom down, others moved out of the line of the classroom door.
Friday and Monday morning I worked in my room to make the small, slight changes to the room.  I took all the suggestions that my 7th graders gave me and did one of my owned, I moved my collaboration table (which is where I am located 50% of class time) by the foyer so I could see door and into the hall at all times.  That Monday I received thank yous, hugs (even from my 8th graders), little notes and small smiles. The number one message I received from my students was they felt safe and were relaxed. How did I know this? Their body language, their laughs, their smiles and their eyes.  
My students had been telling me what they needed for several days, I wasn’t listening.  I did not pay attention to their body language, their facial expressions, their eyes or their smiles, my students were communicating with me and I was not responding.  Our students are communicating with us the best they can and they communicate with us everyday. It is not just about the recently school shootings, it is about their daily needs, their understanding, their confusion, pain, happiness, excitement and  the level of comfort in the classroom. Through their actions in class, in the hallways, the cafe, the bus our students shouting at us. When a student is shutting down, she/he does not raise a hand and state “Mrs. Skiles, I am going to shut down now.”  The student just does it, expressing that shut down happens in many different forms of communication. We as educators need to be aware of the communication, and listen to the communication.
Students do communicate with us everyday day but when a traumatic event on a national scale, like the Parkland shooting, or an event on personal level, students find it difficult to find the words to express their needs. Many students can show opposite effects-a talkative student could become silent, whereas a shy student suddenly opens up, talking and taking on reckless behavior.  A change in behavior is the main indicator of communication. Most of the time when a student is telling us their needs is small subtle ways.
Here are four ways we can “listen” to our students:
  1. Watch the body language-has the body of the language of the student changed in class. The student who once had an open and inviting body language (open palms, arms at rest at the suddenly closed off (arms across like holding the body or turning away from others).  
  2. Pay attention to the eyes-what are your students looking at?  When you talk to them, where do their eyes keep drifting, when they are working, what is drawing their attention?  Example-my students kept looking at the doors specifically the open doors.
  3. A student could be acting normal but has a change in routine-the student seems fine but takes a different route to the locker to avoid the outside door, passes one bathroom to use another.
  4. Open a line of communication with your students that is NOT verbal. Our district uses Canvas as a Learning Management System, the messages I mentioned were from the Canvas email system.  In the past I had students send me a direct comment on a Google Document, this is an awesome feature on Google I will l link the video a made about direct messaging below.  In high school, my modern novel teacher had a note jar, as you walked by her desk just drop a note in the jar (no tech needed.) I believe if I did not have that open line of communication  I might not have discovered their needs.

Please visit the NCTSN website for more information on helping our students through traumatic event.

Sharing to Canvas and Direct Comments-I made this video for my students on direct comments. Direct messages start at the 1:40 mark.

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